Monday, December 6, 2010

The Poop Results Are In! Drumroll Please...

My first ever poll asked: "Has your child ever used the following as a toilet?"
1.  A Candle
2.  The Carpet
3.  The Playground
4.  A Friend's House (anywhere but the toilet)
5.  The Bathtub
6.  Other

It turns out a whopping thirteen of your children have pooped in the bathtub!  (Of course only 27 of you voted.  That's lame.)  I am very surprised that not one of my children has pooped in my bathtub.  We still have many years left so it could easily change.  This is one place I can understand an accident happening.  The bathtub is warm.  Body parts may be relaxed.  Next thing you know, poop.

Another eight of your precious little ones have pooped on the carpet.  Don't you feel better knowing someone else has scrubbed their carpets too?  Somewhere around the world at this very moment a mom may be wearing rubber gloves, sobbing and gagging as they try to remove a brown stain.  This happened to us.  We cleaned it several times.  After that, the carpets came out.

Now, only four of you have experienced the horror of their kid pooping at a friend's house...somewhere other than the toilet.  (Again, only 27 of you voted.  Lame.)  Whoever you are, I need to hear your stories!  Hopefully, it was at the kind of friend's house that didn't care.  Hopefully, it wasn't the friends whose house is meticulous and you are nervous to even sit somewhere.  We visited a friend over the summer and Elia was too busy playing to tell me she needed to go to the bathroom.  She had been potty trained for a month and up until that day had not had one accident...until that day.  Thankfully we were outside. 

Unfortunately, it was a blow out.  Yeah, you all know the kind of mess I am talking about.  There was no padded diaper to help with the mess though.  Her pretty pink Dora undies were smeared with poop.  The thick brown mess had already made its way up her back and onto her shirt.  I took her behind a tree in the backyard, trying to somehow save face.  The mess was no match for me.  Alas, we headed upstairs of the beautifully clean house and put her in their tub.  Elia giggled because she was getting a bath.  I was horrified that my daughter's poopy butt was sitting in my friend's mother's bathtub.  As they say, "poop happens!"

Moving on, two of your kiddos selected, "Other."  One of you confessed to the secret location.  One of you has yet to come forward.  Leave me a comment and let me know where!  We all need to know.

Finally, only one mom (remember, only 27 of you that voted.  Lame) has marveled in the playground poop.  This is another one I've not yet experienced.  I will admit to hiding my boys behind a tree, my car door, and even the garbage can to let them pee.  It was a lot of work to get five kids to the playground.  I sure wasn't going to load them all up and take them home because someone had to pee.  My question is where did the pooping take place?  Was it discreetly done up in a tower?  Did it come out during a trip down the slide?  Could the excitement of the swing lead it to be released?  Again, inquiring moms want to know. 

Poop happens.  It comes with the job.  There's the constipated hard poop, the poop that reveals the kids last meal, and the "pee poop" as we call it, more commonly know as, diarrhea. 

Thanks to the 27 that voted.  To the rest of you are lame.  If I mentioned your poop escapades above, please leave a comment and share your story.  It's more fun to hear from actual people. 

Be sure to vote in the newest poll: "All I Want for Christmas Is..."


  1. Ok, you know you're a mom when you can read a post about poop and not bat an eyelash! I suppose the same could be said about writing the post, yes? :)
    My vote was a boring ol' tub pooper. It's only happened once, and it was actually only a couple months ago,which surprises me because my son is 19 months old. My husband gets in the tub for baths with Jack, and he started yelling for me...Mama to the rescue, I scooped that poop with my bare hands and into the toilet it went. He said he was just going to let the water drain out and then clean it up...I said "Um, it's easier to get it out while it's still floating."

  2. Can I just share for hands were full of poop 2 weeks ago for my 4 year old who decided he would swallow a penny - just to see what would happen. A few days later (and about 4 poops later) the coin came out. I actually made him go into a diaper because I discovered that feeling his poop in the toilet just ain't something that works. Needless to say, poop happens for sure and it can surprise you at times too! (btw -- sorry if I forgot to vote...both my boys have pooped in the tub & the floor in the course of the baby/early toddler years...) Oh yeah.

  3. @Kim...You are a better mom than me! I can't imagine picking up the poop with my hands! The husband would have been scooping that up.
    @Erin...Another thing we haven't experienced, yet. At least it was a penny, not a quarter!


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